Also known as “The only good thing Auto-Tune has ever been used for. Ever. Except maybe this.” This project isn’t particularly new, and I have been basking in the geekiness of this music for a while, but I just realized I neglected to share it with you. What a horrible, selfish whore I am.

(Incidentally, this isn’t a filler piece, even if it may seem that way. I’m partway through several very cool tech posts, including tips on how to write more secure web apps, a review of a fabulous penetration testing tool I have been trying out, and one on taking FBML even further to create a multi-layered FBML mini-site. I’m not slacking off, I promise.)

The Symphony of Science is a musical project headed by John Boswell designed to deliver scientific knowledge and philosophy in musical form. While I cannot speak to the specific process John uses to create these amazing songs, the end result is touching, almost ethereal music that is geekiness personified. Don’t take my word for it though – check out my favorite, The Unbroken Thread:

This piece is particularly touching to me, as I have had the surreal honor of getting to meet Jane Goodall, and talk with her a bit at a very small wellness conference in Colorado a few years back. Jane Goodall has always been a personal hero of mine, and after getting to meet her, and hearing her speak at that conference, my esteem for her only grew. She’s got it all – balls the size of coconuts, wisdom, grace, elegance – and an almost tangible presence of peace and calmness about her.

So to see her mixed in with Carl Sagan and David Attenborough – wow. Just wow. I can barely make it through this song without my eyes getting a little misty.

But if that hippie shit isn’t your thing, check out these two uber-geeky songs:

The music is free to download, so make with the clicky, pronto.

Visit the website, learn more about John and what he is trying to accomplish through this project, watch the videos, follow them on Twitter, and sign up for the mailing list so you can be notified of new masterpieces.

And please – if you can spare some change – consider donating to the project. I did. I sent John money, and a note with my deepest thanks for doing this. This music validates and celebrates adult geeks everywhere, and draws in a new generation of geeks and potential geeks everywhere. I’m a big fan of nerdcore music, as you probably know, but this goes beyond the otaku and geek pop culture, and touches me on an even deeper level.

And on that, enough with the serious touchy-feely stuff. I’ll be back with my regularly scheduled snark later. But have a go fuck yourself for good measure.

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…also known as the best thing evar. I don’t normally post such self-indulgent fare on this site (that’s what Twitter is for!), but this was just too good, and I adore this artist enough that it gives me another excuse to pimp him out.

My friend Dale Chase, sound designer and the mastermind behind the outstandingly sexy-smooth song, Coder Girl, wrote a song about little old me. The song is called ‘Sniped’, and the chorus refers to my moniker on Twitter, @snipeyhead.

Listen to ‘Sniped’ now!

‘Sniped’ Lyrics

(Also available on Dale’s website.)

You don’t want an exchange
kid, I’m tellin’ you her value’s way outta range
straight serving your zone

Leave’n ya’ with cracked bones and have you folded at home
You’re Frakked with a capital K

When she’s allocating time to kick your ass all day
wear down your sector

You can’t read or write
Don’t get too close because you might get sniped

Time may never undo
Methods she employs to best control u

You might be tighter than 12k
But, when she’s through
you’re more hotdog down a hallway

douchenuker.com
obliterate your bots
your net’s dot gone

designer, swordfighter, warcrafter
mess with the best
get crushed by the ban hammer

(chorus)

S
N I
P E

Code Monkey, yes
And one hotkey

no doubt, man
her source is tight

Don’t get too close
because you might get sniped

Y
H E
A D

Executes
Without an IDE

no doubt, man
her source is tight

Don’t get too close
because you might get sniped

(verse 2)

You’re dealing with a walking force-quit
tryin’ to flip her script could get u nixed

Or better yet, drop boxed
She don’t need wi-fi to cause a hotspot

to what I’m saying you should listen intently
Quibble with the chisel get belittled like bit.ly

did I mention that she’s a coder girl
rockin’ ruby and perl, commands in c’url

a pretty package, but I’m sayin don’t try
You might as well google wave goodbye

Get your click dragged, with no lag
So NSFW

Bringing trouble to
Whoever disrespect

Cuz What you’re apt to get
Hit the tweetdeck

Cuz while you’re there laid out on the mat
I’m a play you off like that keyboard cat

(chorus)

Coder Girl

I first sought out Dale because of his Coder Girl video. I went to his website and realized he was on Twitter, so I tagged him there. We met up at Shrine in Harlem one night at a Big Ben Hillman show. He is just delightful – very clever and charming, as one would expect from someone who could create such a fabulously geeky homage to that rare breed of programmer of the female persuasion. (And I think he might be single, ladies!)

If you haven’t checked out the Coder Girl song, check it below. What nerd-girl could resist this smooth-talking geek?

If you love Coder Girl as much as I do, make sure to stop by his website or Last.Fm page and download it or get it as a ringtone, and hit him up on Twitter. He’s a great guy, and I’m sure he’d love to hear from you. Or better yet, Go buy his album, Abso-Defilutely! on Amazon MP3.

Marketing Genius

While I would never accuse Dale of being so sneaky as to have planned this deliberately, he’s come across a very clever marketing ploy here. Write songs about people with lots of Twitter followers, and they will – of course – pimp you out because they’re self-absorbed enough to want everyone to hear a song about them. It’s a win-win situation that benefits everyone. Well played, sir. You can write songs about me anytime, and I’ll pimp you out to everyone I know.

This kid is going places, mark my words – and I’m not just saying that because he wrote a song about me – I loved him for Coder Girl before this song. If R&B isn’t your thing, don’t fret – I know from personal experience that he’s got the chops to be a badass nerdcore rockstar.

Did I mention you can buy his album, Abso-Defilutely! on Amazon MP3?? Do it. Now. You’ll thank me later. Its the best six bucks you’ll spend.

Related Links

• Buy Absodefilutely on Amazon MP3 now
• Dale Chase’s website
• Dale Chase on Last.Fm
• Coder Girl on YouTube
• Abso-defilutely! on Last.Fm
• @daleochase on Twitter

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I’m a big nerdcore hip-hop fangirl, as you’ve probably figured out by now if you’ve spent any time in the Music section of this site or following me on Twitter. On Friday night, I was fortunate enough to go to a very limited screening of the documentary Nerdcore Rising, at 92YTribeca in New York City.

Wait, What the Hell is Nerdcore?

From Wikipedia:

Nerdcore hip hop, or simply nerdcore, is subgenre of hip hop music characterized by themes and subject matter considered to be of general interest to nerds, though it can appeal to others as well. Self-described nerdcore musician MC Frontalot coined the term in 2000 in the song “Nerdcore Hiphop”. Frontalot, like most nerdcore artists, self-publishes his work and has released much of it for free online. As a niche genre, nerdcore generally holds to the DIY ethic, has a history of self-publishing and self-production.

So, that’s the semi-official definition. Nerdcore is hip-hop about stuff geeks care about. Blogging, coding, science, sci-fi, comic books, and so on. It is very often funny, but I do not consider it a novelty genre at all. This is not Weird Al (no disrespect to Weird Al whatsoever – I have always been and always will be a huge fan of his.)

Many of these guys have actual hip-hop chops and make great music – the geeky themes and frequent humor are an added bonus, but it’s not what carries the music.

Okay… But What the Hell is Nerdcore Rising?

From the Nerdcore Rising website:

The documentary “Nerdcore Rising” investigates the newest wave of hip-hop, nerdcore, as it follows the godfather of the genre, MC Frontalot, on his first national tour. Beginning in South Carolina and culminating in nerd mecca – the Penny Arcade Gaming Convention in Seattle – masses of fans across the country come out to bask in the Front’s geek glory as he strives to achieve mainstream success.

In this movie, we follow Damian Hess (MC Frontalot), Brandon Patton (Blak Lotus, named after one of the most valuable Magic: The Gathering cards), Gaby Alter (G minor 7) and Sturgis Cunningham (The Sturgenius) on their first national tour.

There were only two New York City screenings scheduled, both on the same night, both of which were sold out. The screening room was tiny – maybe 50 seats – which made for a very intimate setting. It was uncomfortably warm, but the movie was so engaging, no one seemed to mind too much once the movie started. (Side note: 92YTribeca has some of the best hot chocolate in New York City, which was a lucky break considering the 3,875 mile an hour blasts of icy wind that was slowly stripping away at the flesh on my face during the painfully long walk to the theater from the parking lot.)

Nerdcore Rising is, in a word, utterly delightful. (Okay, that’s two words, but delightful didn’t seem emphatic enough, and who says “in two words”?) For a first attempt at film-making (as director Negin Farsad kept drunkenly reminding us), this really was an exceptional piece of work.

The actual footage taken (I think Farsad mentioned there were 400 hours — holy crap!) was at times thoughtful and sensitive, other times outrageously silly, as one would expect with this particular band of leading men.

I discovered the nerdcore scene a little late in the game, only a few years ago, and ended up bullshitting with Front, MC Lars and YTCracker at my first show, and the movie answered some questions that I probably would not have wanted to ask them directly. In Nerdcore Rising, Frontalot is candid about his concerns about the success of the tour, and plainly explains that this is the point in his life where he has to decide whether to pursue this as a full-time thing, or leave it as a hobby that he works on when he can.

The tour was not without incident, as Front’s back goes out halfway through, and Gaby misplaces a crucial piece of equipment the night before a show – but they keep their spirits up, and keep at it. Their energy and individual personalities and quirks really come through, and you end up feeling like you know them better after it’s over.

As you follow them across the country, from hole-in-the-wall joints in the south-east with 8 fans, to a triumphant victory at a packed show at PAX, you’re rooting for them the whole time, even though you know how the story plays out.

In several song clips throughout the movie, subtitles were provided with the lyrics to the song, and the way they were executed was simply delightful. Frontalot has a cadence to his music that’s hard for me to keep up with, even knowing all of the words, and the subtitles were perfect, in both font choice and frenetic, bouncy placement on screen. (The way I’m describing it makes it sound really cheesy – I promise you, it’s not. It’s quite awesome.)  I wouldn’t have thought subtitles could possibly come close to mirroring the fantastically spastic movements of Frontalot on stage, but I was clearly wrong.

Woven into the film are interviews with other folks in the music industry, including Prince Paul, Weird Al, Jello Biafra, YTCracker, Beefy, the boys from Penny Arcade, and tons of others.

This story is inspirational and hilarious. Seriously, it was better than Cats. The editing was superb, cut with deliberately comic timing. Farsad is a stand-up comic as well as the director, so I expect she had a lot of influence on the editing, and it shows. They poke gentle, loving fun at their nerdiness (and the nerdiness of their audience) and celebrate it in the same breath – something I thin most modern geeks can appreciate.

After the screening, Farsad and the band hung around for some Q&A. I was at the second showing, and Farsad was clearly feeling the wines she was drinking, but it only added to the fun of the evening. Poor Frontalot suffered through the Q&A, juicy head and all.

I’ll be honest – even if the movie sucked, I love these guys so much, I wouldn’t have cared. But it didn’t suck – it really was an excellent film, fangirliness aside.

An added bonus, we got to sit down and bullshit with Brandon and Gaby over some beers after the screening. The bar was loud, so I didn’t get to chat with Gaby much, but Brandon, his fabulously nerdy girlfriend, and their friend Chris and I talked for several hours, only a tiny percentage of which involved music at all.

If you’re into nerdcore and you didn’t get to catch a screening, you can (and should!) buy the DVD – and any other shwag you can afford. Years worth of blood, sweat and tears went into this film in return for an exceptional amount of debt and the adoration of a small but dedicated group of nerds. Seriously – its only $20. You spend more than that on Magic: the Gathering crap in a week. Buy it now.

And put a banner on your blog. I know you have one. Only geeks read this website, and geeks have blogs. Or at the very least, you have a MySpace page. So banner up, bucko. Show some nerd love.

Also be sure to check out the additional web content on the Nerdcore Rising website, including material from other nerdcore artists, and the video blog. And if you’ve got a gaggle of geeks handy, coordinate and request a showing of the film in your town.

If you can’t get enough nerdy music, be sure to check out the Hipster, Please! podcast and blog.

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Those of you into nerdcore, you simply MUST check out Old Nerdy Bastard – a collection of FREE nerdcore mashups featuring the music of MC Frontalot, MC Lars, Baddd Spellah, Optimus Rhyme, MC Hawking, and others. It is teh awesome, and it is teh free, so get with teh downloady. Also, if this kind of music is your thing, you may want to check out Radio Free Hipster’s podcast.

The track list is below – not to be missed!

1. Baddd Spellah – “99 Balloon Flights (The Grammar Club vs. Nena)”
2. The Weasel King – “Red Hair (2DefMice Nerdy Gospel Mix)”
3. Snake Eyes – “Transformer (Sara Connor’s Wild Ride Mix)(Maja vs. Lou Reed vs. Traci Chapman vs. Brad Fiedel)”
4. Random – “Robot City (feat. YTCracker and JonBap) (Larry Legend Remix)”
5. Ginny and the Heartbreakers – “Halloween at Hogwarts (D-Form Bass Mix)”
6. nYgel – “6 MCs (and 1 DJ) Who Like Schoolly D (Commodore 64 vs. Beastie Boys vs. Bloodhound Gang)”
7. Optimus Rhyme – “Just Forget It (Cheeks Remix)”
8. YTCracker – “In My Time (Dumbledork Remix)”
9. Brad Sucks – “Sick as a Dog (Antisoc Remix)”
10. Harry and the Potters – “Felix Felicis (Dumbledore’s DS Mix by Paradise Dan of Monsterface Industries)”
11. MC Frontalot – “Braggadocio (killsaly’s Super Saiyan Remix)”
12. MC Hawking – “Why Won’t Jesse Helms Just Hurry Up and Die (Smoke ‘Em if You Got ‘Em Remix)”
13. Trier Music – “Hyphy Sunglasses (MC Lars vs. ZZ Top vs. John Bonham vs. Phish vs. Vanilla Ice)”
14. The Whomping Willows – “This Arboreal Coil (TrierMusic deathstepWTFLOL mix)”
15. Hidari – “Clambon (Glenn Case Campfire Singalong Mix)”
16. Dual Core – “Orbit (Remix)”
17. Schaffer the Darklord – “Nerd Lust (Peeved Remix)”
18. The Evolution Control Committee – “Pwn Monkey (Jonathan Coulton vs. … well, everyone)”

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Some of you probably already know I’m a big fan of Jonathan Coulton – he’s not nerdcore, but instead considered ‘filk’ (for fiction folk music). Nerdcore, for those of you unfamiliar with its glory, is basically hip-hop for nerdy white computer dorks. And its *good*. Really, really good. (Obviously, there’s going to be crap out there, too – its not all bunnies and sunshine – but there are some really great nerdcore artists out there.)

Nerdcore has been around for a while now, and I’m not sure why I never mentioned it before.. but anyway, If you haven’t had a chance to check these guys out, and you like the beat of hip-hop but not the messages of violence, misogyny, drugs, dog-fighting and prostitution, I highly recommend the following:

* Optimus Rhyme
LOVE these guys. Some favorites: Reboot, Ping Pong, Autobeat Airbus, Obey the Moderator, Super Shiny Metal

* MC Frontalot
SO awesome. You can download a ton of his music here. My favs: Braggadocio, Indier Than Thou, Hipster Girl, It Is Pitch Dark (yes, there is a grue involved – can find the video on this website too), Message No. 419 (about nigerian scammers), Origin Of Species, Penny Arcade Theme, This Old Man, Which MC Was That?, I Hate Your Blog

* MC Lars

Branded “post-punk laptop rap”, this kid has some great stuff. My favs: Download This Song, Hot Topic Is Not Punk Rock, Space Game, iGeneration, If I Had a Time Machine, That Would Be Fresh, Internet Relationships (Are Not Real Relationships), The Roomate From Hell (featuring MC Chris as Lucifer… of *course*.)

* YTCracker

Other notable mentions:
* MC Plus + is considered nerdcore, he’s not actually that good. Bummer, really – his name had me laughing my ass off, so I had high hopes.

* MC Hawking – pretty funny – hip-hop and rap done in the robot voice of Steven Hawking. He sings about entropy and quantum physics. The voice schtick wears off after a bit, but its entertaining in small doses.

* Futuristic Sex Robots -I have been unable to find any place to actually pay for this music, but you can download their Hotel Coral Essex album from Last.fm for free.

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I have iTunes running during the day, with over 8,000 songs on random. “You Oughtta Know” just came on – and as she’s singing “… the cross I bear that you gave me to”, I accidentally sang “… the cross-eyed bear that you gave to me” – and now I cant stop hearing that as the lyrics. Worse yet is the definition that the Urban Dictionary gives for “cross-eyed bear.”

*sigh*

I think I need more sleep.

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I spent (wasted?) too much of today making mp3 ringtones. Since I went through the trouble of creating them, I figured I’d post them, in case anyone wants them as well (assuming your phone can play mp3s). Most of these are clipped to under 30 seconds, but there are a few that are a bit longer.

Most are set at about 48 Constant Bit Rate, however some are a little higher, and the long ones may have been saved at a lower Bit Rate to reduce filesize. I edited most of these myself (all actually, except for the pop music stuff) so blame my editing if it doesn’t capture exactly the bits you wanted.

UPDATE: These links are working again – thanks to @Teifion for bringing the broken links to my attention.
UPDATE Dec 2009: Added a few more, mostly from classic cartoons (“Small fry” and Owl Jolson’s “I love to Singa” and a few from Rankin/Bass’ The Hobbit.)

Family Guy:
* Chumbawumba – 122K (20 seconds)
* Quagmire “Giggitty” – 10k (1 second)
* “I’m a Tumor” song – 59k (8 seconds)
* Stewie: “For the next 5 hours, you’re my bitch” – 22k (3 seconds)
* Quagmire: “Why are you still here?” – 72k (9 seconds)
* Creepy old guy’s answering machine messages to Chris – 194k (49 seconds)
* “Can’t touch me” song – 180k (22 seconds)
* “Why did the dinosaurs die out?” “Because you touch yourself at night” – 30k (4 seconds)
* Chris: “You dropped something – my jaw. Aww right….” – 61k (8 seconds)
* Mayor West: “You are a filthy whore” – 19k (2 seconds)
* Stewie: “Go fuck yourself” – 7k (2 seconds)
* Peter: “Jeez, what a bitch” – 7k (2 seconds)
* Shatner: “Kahn!!” – 146k (18 seconds)
* Brian: “Peanut butter jelly time” – 142k (21 seconds)
* Stewie: “My fat baby loves to eat” song – 206k
* Stewie talking to Brian about his novel – 223k (45 seconds)
* Peter: “Up in my bum” Christmas song – 44k (5 seconds)
* Louis/Stewie: “Worst mother” – 23k (3 seconds)
* “You have AIDS” song – 212k (43 seconds)

Futurama:
* Grunka Lunka “secret ingredient” – 118k (12 seconds)
* Hypnotoad (Loop) – 45k

Space Ghost Coast to Coast:
* Brak: Beef log – 111k
* Brak: “I’m a cucumber” – 193k
* Space Ghost/Brak: “Minky Boodle” – 156k
* Zorak: “We like girls” – 135k

Robot Chicken:
* Apocalypse Pony – 194k

The Hobbit (Rankin/Bass)
* Down to Goblin Town
* That’s What Bilbo Baggins Hates
* Funny Little Things (Fifteen Birds)

Return of the King (Rankin/Bass)
* Where There’s a Whip There’s a Way

Misc Cartoons
* Small Fry (Max Fleischer’s classic cartoon)
* I love to Singa

Muppets:
* Not Easy Being Green – 159k (27 seconds)
* Swedish Chef bork bork bork – 87k (8 seconds)
* Fraggle Rock theme – 134k (22 seconds)
* Kermit: “Who let the frogs out?” song – 158k (26 seconds)
* New Sound song – 235k (30 seconds)
* Habanera (by Beaker and the Swedish Chef)
* Podlings Song from The Dark Crystal – 208k

Charlie the Unicorn:
* Charlie – 82k
* Candy Mountain song – 247k
* Joy and joyness – 53k
* Liopleurodon – 57k
* Shun the non-believer – 86k
* Wake up, Charlie – 87k

Winnie the Pooh:
* “Up, Down, Touch the Ground” song – 165k (24 seconds)

Up:
* “Heeeere snipe”

Jonathan Coulton:
* RE: Your Brains (Chorus)
* Mr. Fancy Pants (Chorus)

Finding Nemo:
* Dory: “Just keep swimming” – 50k (5 seconds)
* Sea Turtle: “Duuuuude” – 90k (13 seconds)
* Dory: “Speaking whale” – 179k (18 seconds)
* Dory: “My squishy” – 64k (9 seconds)

Commercials:
* Coca-Cola: “Lime in the coconut” – 174k (25 seconds)
* Honda Element: “I peench” – 188k (27 seconds)
* Skittles: Yodeling rabbit – 188k (27 seconds)

Weird Al:
* Harvey the wonder hamster – 165k
* White and nerdy – 235k
* Gotta boogie – 235k

Misc. Movies:
* Little Mermaid: “Maybe he’s right, maybe there is something the matter with me” – 24k
* Robots: “Get up offa that thing” – 235k

Music:
* Beck: “Loser” – 151k
* Jane Siberry: “Everything reminds me of my dog” – 244k
* Dixie Chicks: “Goodbye Earl” – 71k
* Fergie – “London Bridge” – 198k
* VIllage People: “YMCA” – 235k

Dr. Demento:
* Carrot juice is murder – 205k
* Junk food junkie – 235k

Misc. (funny):
* “Ding, fries are done” (Burger King) – 228k
* Gay muppet bar – 247k
* Bilbo Baggins (by Nimoy) – 235k
* Ren and Stimpy: “Log” – 180k
* Steve Martin & David Letterman yelling “Vagina!”

Misc. (not funny):
* Mercy – 238k
* Party & Bullshit (Biggie remix by Ratatat)
* Halo 3 ODST Live-Action Commercial song (“Lament”)
* Scene from the movie ‘Carrie’ – “They’re all going to laugh you!” (thanks, @prp2!)
* Cheech’s “Pussy” speech in ‘From Dusk Til Dawn’

Monty Python:
* Lovely bunch of coconuts – 167k
* Altzheimers answering machine – 199k

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